Aunt Ivonne was in the garden tending to her flowers when she got the
urge to pee. So she did and wiped off her dew on a rose. Uncle Fred came
along later, picked up the rose, sniffed it, then ran to phone the
newspaper editor.
"I found a rose that smells like a woman's you-know-what!"
The editor said, "That's nothing. When you find
a you-know-what that smells like a rose, call me again."

A young woman asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of penises are
there?"
The mother, surprised, answers, "Well, daughter, a man goes through
three phases. In a man's twenties, a man's penis is like an oak, mighty
and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but
reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."
"A Christmas tree?"
"Yes, dried up and the balls are there for decoration only."